My 2 Lousy Cents

#12

Panelist: Temm-lock

Hey everyone, how's it going? Welcome back to My 2 Lousy Cents! This is our twelfth issue, which should be the anniversary issue, issue-wise, but oh well. Missing two issues forfeited our issue-wise anniversary issue. We'll always just celebrate the anniversary in February, but you can still throw a party because we have twelve issues completed.

Anyway, this month I'm going to be discussing the insane, parody of a story that you all know as Lymbee! Therefore,

Lymbee explained

I hope all of you faithful readers out there..."get" Lymbee. The comedy is completely abstract and bizarre, so some of the jokes may go right over your head. This should train you not to miss a laugh while reading the story.

You see, Lymbee is nothing more than a parody of novel writing. My goal is to make every writing mistake imaginable, while keeping to a decent plot and form. The first joke for each month is the chapter titles. Aren't they just ultimately dorky? This is parodying bad chapter titles (duh). Some of the mistakes are subtle and some are completely obvious. In the first chapter, Lymbee and Flower found a "monese guy alien" and killed it. Wha...? That's what the reader should say. Don't you hate it when authors bring up a subject and then never explain it? That's the deal. In the second chapter, the characters were all very inconsistent and changed attitudes every moment. In the third chapter, obviously, Dare the squirrel's species changed nearly ten times throughout the story. You see the trend here?

Hopefully you will be able to decipher Lymbee a little easier now and catch the small things you didn't notice before. You can even go back and read chapters 1, 2, and 3 again before going on to 4 if you'd like.

I'd like it if some people send in comments about Lymbee, because I really want to know if you think its funny.

Ok, its that time again. The time for everyone to fall asleep and ignore their computers, while I tell

Tem's Lousy Redwall Joke of the Month

A ferret answered the phone. "Hello?" he said. There was no-one on the other end. "Hello?" he asked once again. There was no-one on the other end. He hung up the phone and went back to work. The phone rang again. "Hello?" answered the ferret. "Oh, hi." answered the rat on the other end, "I forgot to talk last time!"

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! (Takes up space in the article) Hahahahahahahaha!

On a serious note, Terrouge has announced the top 30 characters who applied for Questors Bold 2, another Redwall survivor RPG in the fashion of ROC: Survivor. Go on over and vote for your favorite character in each of the ten categories!

Well, that's all for his month. Too short for your liking? Well, who ever told you this would be long? The column's purpose is absolutely nothing at all, so just read it, laugh, and go on to the next article.

Have a nice day (metaphorically) ((completely over-used joke after twelve times))

Disregards (Ditto)

~Tem